11-28-2007

9:30p
The end of synchro?
I really love skating on the synchro team. I miss dancing with a group a lot, and it's a good replacement for that. I am good at picking up the routine and remembering it. I actually do a good job of skating in pinwheels (where I am almost always on the end) and my power (especially in backward crossovers!) has improved so much since I joined the team.

BUT- going that fast I cannot turn CCW. I thought I'd be able to pick it up, but I'm getting nowhere. I can't even do a two foot turn that fast- and belive me I'm trying. It would be less noticable cheat. But I obviously cheat and do them all 2 footed CW. That's 1 mohawk, and 2 seperate three-turns that I'm doing the wrong in this program. Then I also can't do the backward lunge. And I have a hard time catching my line in 2 places. I feel like I'm doing more things wrong then right.

For the christmas show, I feel like it's not a big deal. But I can't compete skating like this- and in 4-5 months I have had no improvement on the turns or lunge. I won't have it by the competition. It will hurt the team and it will waste my money to go. Since synchro is part of LTS, the $90 every 8-weeks isn't too much, but it adds up. Add in the second costume we'll have to buy, plus transportation, and that's a lot of money for me to go and insure my team a low score because I can't do the program.

I hate the idea of quitting something I like, and I hate even more thinking that it might cause problems to remove me from the program. But I am not adding value to the team at all. I come home from about half the practices wanting to cry because I feel like I'm making things worse for the team. Last week I came home really happy, feeling like we made good progress- but the progress we made as a group was on things I wasn't necessarily having trouble on as an individual, just as part of the group. My individual problems are not getting better and I don't know how to address them.

But I think my synchro days might be over.